Last January, on the encouragement of my mother-in-law and others, I started the process of turning my little Christmas-season fundraiser into a legal business. It was a daunting task and I experienced a lot of self doubt. But I got it all taken care of and turned my attention to lining up places to sell.
In March I made some samples, printed out pictures, and nervously went to craft fair jurying at a local Catholic school. This school holds a three-day fair every winter. This is the big one. If you're a vendor, this is the one you want to be invited to. They invite back the top 75% of vendors every year, leaving only about 25 available spots to be fought over.
I felt under-qualified and very anxious. In the car on the drive home, I prayed to Heavenly Father and basically put it into His hands. "If this is what you want me to do and it would be a positive experience for my family, please make it so." Two months later, I didn't receive an acceptance letter in the mail as I hoped. Bummer. Oh well, I guess it wasn't meant to be.
Then in late September I got a surprise phone call from the school. They had a spot open up and wanted me to fill it! It was so exciting and validating! But then two days later I realized that in order to be a vendor, you're required to commit to selling on all three days of the fair, including Sunday, which is my Sabbath. Why didn't I notice that when I first applied? I felt so stupid for not knowing beforehand and wasting my time and theirs by going through the jurying process.
I called the school immediately and bowed out. Our family Christmas budget depends on the success of my sales each year. And now with all the expenses I incurred with license fees and insurance, it was extremely important that I move more product. I was so sad that I would miss this incredible opportunity, but keeping the Sabbath day holy is non-negotiable for me. And for me, that means not working on my business on that day.
I prayed hard. I knew Heavenly Father knew what was going on and I exercised faith that all would work out.
The fall and winter went on, I was able to sell at 4 different fairs (one ended up being on the same Saturday as the "Big One"), I got a ton of custom orders, and it seemed to be going well. And yet, as I recorded my expenses and sales as I went along, I began to doubt myself and worry. It appeared that I wasn't going to turn a very large profit this year, if any at all. I was putting too much work into this to have such a sad balance sheet! I cursed the state of California and it's oppressive small business regulations.
I counseled with Hubby and he assured me that even if I didn't turn a huge profit this year, that it was ok and nothing to fret over. Yes, our financial situation sucks and a successful small business would be a huge blessing (not just for Christmas), but we've always managed somehow before. If nothing else, this was a valuable year of learning!
True to form, I stressed out while Hubby was calm and faithful. I worried about how to provide a nice Christmas for the kids while he told me to chill out and reminded me that things always work out one way or another.
Then we started to experience blessings and miracles.
With the assistance of wonderful friends, we were able to find a few nice presents for the kids at great discount or free. I was content.
And then just a few days before Christmas, after all my fairs were done and orders delivered, I sat down again to evaluate my balance sheet. I discovered a huge accounting error!
I don't know how it happened, but somewhere along the line I must have recorded something wrong. It turned out that I had made a profit much larger than I thought. It felt like one of those "tithing testimonies" that I have heard so many times. The ones where people say, "I was faithful and paid my tithing even though it looked like I wouldn't have enough room in the budget for it. And then at the end of the month I miraculously had enough for everything. The math didn't add up but everything was provided for."
As I sat in Sacrament meeting this Sunday, the talk was about blessings of keeping the Sabbath day holy. I felt the clear impression that this unexpected profit was to teach me that I was right in trusting in God and turning down that big fair. I was blessed for not hesitating to stay true to my convictions.
Heavenly Father knows the end from the beginning. I didn't need that three-day fair. Heavenly Father knew that my family would be just fine without it. And furthermore, I believe His hand helped guide and inspire the friends who told me about three of my four successful fairs. I was having no luck in doing my own research, but these ladies each knew about opportunities and thoughtfully passed the info along to me.
Having faith means to believe something even though you can't see it. That includes acting according to your beliefs, even though you don't know what the outcome will be. Sometimes our faith and trust in the Lord is rewarded with immediate blessings. And sometimes we have to wait a little while (or a long while.) God loves us and He knows perfectly our situation, personality, struggles, what we need to learn, and how and when we need to learn it.
Thursday, December 31, 2015
Wednesday, December 23, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#20
...to confuse people, I'm tempted to say m children actually attend an "exclusive boarding school." It's so exclusive, you have to be related to the principle to enroll!
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Tuesday, December 15, 2015
Homeschooling Sick Days
Today I'm thankful that homeschooling works for us.
This week our family is battling illness.
Yesterday we sat comfortably on the couches to do some reading and math pages. Then by lunch time I was in desperate need of a nap. So I passed out on the couch while the kids learned about the Revolutionary War by watching "Liberty's Kids."
Today the kids are playing with Pattern Blocks while listening to an audio book of A Christmas Carol.
Homeschooling is allowing us to go at our own pace and take a more relaxed day when we need to, yet still be able to do some curriculum even with illness. If the kids went to public school, they would be missing out on important instruction by taking a sick day and be behind. Also, my nap yesterday, which went until dinner time, would have caused a problem for pick-up time.
This week our family is battling illness.
Yesterday we sat comfortably on the couches to do some reading and math pages. Then by lunch time I was in desperate need of a nap. So I passed out on the couch while the kids learned about the Revolutionary War by watching "Liberty's Kids."
Today the kids are playing with Pattern Blocks while listening to an audio book of A Christmas Carol.
Homeschooling is allowing us to go at our own pace and take a more relaxed day when we need to, yet still be able to do some curriculum even with illness. If the kids went to public school, they would be missing out on important instruction by taking a sick day and be behind. Also, my nap yesterday, which went until dinner time, would have caused a problem for pick-up time.
Sunday, December 13, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#19
...the teacher doesn't get fired for leaving the students with independent work while sneaking away to take a shower.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Wednesday, December 2, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#18
...enduring some playful razzing from my older brothers when they see the kids' end of the year Certificates of Achievement, signed by me of course, on the wall.
"Did they receive certificates for perfect attendance, too?" "Who was student of the month this month?" "Who won class president this year? I bet it was a close race. Did she make outlandish campaign promises like, 'ice cream for lunch'?"
I love those meanie-poo-poo-heads.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
"Did they receive certificates for perfect attendance, too?" "Who was student of the month this month?" "Who won class president this year? I bet it was a close race. Did she make outlandish campaign promises like, 'ice cream for lunch'?"
I love those meanie-poo-poo-heads.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Sunday, November 22, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#17
...having the following awkward conversation:
We were at the library after school. We have daughters the same age.
Public schooling friend: "Suzy only has to do one page of math homework-front and back-a night. So it's not that bad. But some nights it takes her forever! Like an hour and a half! It's not that the math is too hard for her, it's just that homework time is such a fight for us!"
Me: "Oh, I know. That's gotta be hard. Math is sometimes no fun."
-lull in conversation-
Me: (Trying to think of something to say to show I can relate to her.) "I let my girls do their work in any order during the week. So they have a set amount of math pages and I don't care when they complete them. Last week Secundus decided to procrastinate and leave all her math until Friday! Boy, was she regretting that!"
PS friend: (Polite smile.) "Yeah."
I love that my public schooling friends don't seem to feel awkward talking about their kids' school experience -the good and the bad- in front of me! But sometimes I just don't know what to say in response. Or, at least, I'm not good at thinking of good things to say in the moment. Our experiences really don't match up sometimes!
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
We were at the library after school. We have daughters the same age.
Public schooling friend: "Suzy only has to do one page of math homework-front and back-a night. So it's not that bad. But some nights it takes her forever! Like an hour and a half! It's not that the math is too hard for her, it's just that homework time is such a fight for us!"
Me: "Oh, I know. That's gotta be hard. Math is sometimes no fun."
-lull in conversation-
Me: (Trying to think of something to say to show I can relate to her.) "I let my girls do their work in any order during the week. So they have a set amount of math pages and I don't care when they complete them. Last week Secundus decided to procrastinate and leave all her math until Friday! Boy, was she regretting that!"
PS friend: (Polite smile.) "Yeah."
I love that my public schooling friends don't seem to feel awkward talking about their kids' school experience -the good and the bad- in front of me! But sometimes I just don't know what to say in response. Or, at least, I'm not good at thinking of good things to say in the moment. Our experiences really don't match up sometimes!
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Saturday, November 14, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#16
...my dream is to trade in my minivan for an old school bus and then paint it to look like Ms. Frizzle's Magic School Bus.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Friday, November 13, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#15
...every time my kids exhibit a quirk my brother condescendingly, playfully explains, "it's because they're homeschooled."
Also, homeschooling means that every time my nieces or nephews exhibit a quirk I condescndingly, playfully explain to my brother, "it's because they go to public school."
Nothing but mutual respect and love in my family! :)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Also, homeschooling means that every time my nieces or nephews exhibit a quirk I condescndingly, playfully explain to my brother, "it's because they go to public school."
Nothing but mutual respect and love in my family! :)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Thursday, November 12, 2015
Candy Cane Science
Yay for interest-led learning and on-the-fly science lessons!
This morning for a treat at breakfast I made hot chocolate for the kids. I even found the candy canes I had bought after Christmas last year on sale and stirred those in. When the candy canes disappeared as if by magic, that led to a great, quick science lesson.
We stuck one candy cane in a glass of refrigerated cold water, and one cane in a glass of hot tap water. Then they were set on the table for observation while we finished breakfast.
It was very clear that the candy dissolved much quicker in the hot water. The kids even noticed that the hot water was a deeper pink color and tasted more minty.
This morning for a treat at breakfast I made hot chocolate for the kids. I even found the candy canes I had bought after Christmas last year on sale and stirred those in. When the candy canes disappeared as if by magic, that led to a great, quick science lesson.
We stuck one candy cane in a glass of refrigerated cold water, and one cane in a glass of hot tap water. Then they were set on the table for observation while we finished breakfast.
It was very clear that the candy dissolved much quicker in the hot water. The kids even noticed that the hot water was a deeper pink color and tasted more minty.
Sunday, October 18, 2015
I'm the Mustard Girl!
Some of us exist as two dimensional cartoon characters in the minds of our friends' friends. Your friend shared with their other friends some silly, funny, or endearing story about you. Something that makes you memorable. So now these other people know you as simply the character in this story.
For instance, perhaps you have a relative that once answered the question, "Do you prefer chunky or smooth peanut butter?" with a sheepish, "Chunky would be nice once in a while." And then you shared that cute story with your friend.
Fast forward several weeks (or months, or years) and you have the following conversation:
friend: "What'd you do this weekend?"
you: "I helped my relative Joe move."
friend: "Which one is Joe? I can't remember if I've met him."
you: "He was the peanut butter guy."
friend: "Oh, yeah! lol. He's awesome."
Sometimes these cartoon characters only have a vague physical description and one or two stories. Sometimes, though, these characters have entire episodes or their own series. When I was in high school my freshman English teacher would sometimes waste whole class periods telling us about his own teenage adventures with Big Frank. Big Frank was so clearly a cartoon character. We had never been shown a photograph of this living, breathing person; but we all had a very clear picture in our minds of this tall, broad-shouldered, dopey-looking, slightly slow minded boy who was always up for any trouble the rest of the group could think up.
As I shared this insight with some friends last night, I wondered if I was a cartoon character in other people's lives and I was curious what was said about me.
That's when Jeff laid it on me: I am the girl who is so ridiculously frugal that I don't even buy French's Mustard, opting instead to save 20 cents by going with the store brand.
To hear him tell the story that he has shared with his friends of the cartoon character of me was hilarious. I thought I would be more self-conscious about it, but it's too funny!
What's your favorite cartoon character story that's been shared with you or that you've shared? Are you a cartoon character?
For instance, perhaps you have a relative that once answered the question, "Do you prefer chunky or smooth peanut butter?" with a sheepish, "Chunky would be nice once in a while." And then you shared that cute story with your friend.
Fast forward several weeks (or months, or years) and you have the following conversation:
friend: "What'd you do this weekend?"
you: "I helped my relative Joe move."
friend: "Which one is Joe? I can't remember if I've met him."
you: "He was the peanut butter guy."
friend: "Oh, yeah! lol. He's awesome."
Sometimes these cartoon characters only have a vague physical description and one or two stories. Sometimes, though, these characters have entire episodes or their own series. When I was in high school my freshman English teacher would sometimes waste whole class periods telling us about his own teenage adventures with Big Frank. Big Frank was so clearly a cartoon character. We had never been shown a photograph of this living, breathing person; but we all had a very clear picture in our minds of this tall, broad-shouldered, dopey-looking, slightly slow minded boy who was always up for any trouble the rest of the group could think up.
As I shared this insight with some friends last night, I wondered if I was a cartoon character in other people's lives and I was curious what was said about me.
That's when Jeff laid it on me: I am the girl who is so ridiculously frugal that I don't even buy French's Mustard, opting instead to save 20 cents by going with the store brand.
To hear him tell the story that he has shared with his friends of the cartoon character of me was hilarious. I thought I would be more self-conscious about it, but it's too funny!
What's your favorite cartoon character story that's been shared with you or that you've shared? Are you a cartoon character?
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
A Missed Opportunity?
I found a dead crow in the backyard this morning (the neighbors' cats are good hunters). As I went to throw it in the garbage (picking it up with a double layer of trash bags) I had this internal conflicted dialogue:
grossed-out me: "Eewww!"
homeschooling me: "This is actually pretty cool. Not rotted from what I can see."
g: "Weirdo. This is so gross! I don't want to touch it!"
h: "I should use this as a learning opportunity."
g: "The kids should stay inside. They shouldn't see this."
h: "But to see the beak and claws up close would be a unique opportunity."
g: "But it's dead and therefore icky."
h: "Oh, wow, it's so light! Hmmm...hollow bones make it easier for birds to fly because they're lighter. Cool."
g: "Ew. Ew. Ew. I'm holding it! Put it in the garbage fast!"
homeschooling me: "This is actually pretty cool. Not rotted from what I can see."
g: "Weirdo. This is so gross! I don't want to touch it!"
h: "I should use this as a learning opportunity."
g: "The kids should stay inside. They shouldn't see this."
h: "But to see the beak and claws up close would be a unique opportunity."
g: "But it's dead and therefore icky."
h: "Oh, wow, it's so light! Hmmm...hollow bones make it easier for birds to fly because they're lighter. Cool."
g: "Ew. Ew. Ew. I'm holding it! Put it in the garbage fast!"
So no, the kids did not get to dissect or even investigate a dead crow today. But Secundus did find a feather and thought it was so cool that in the light it actually looked bluish instead of black. So not totally wasted?
Another fun note: as I leaned down to pick it up, Secundus was like, "What if it's still alive?" Not helpful!
Another fun note: as I leaned down to pick it up, Secundus was like, "What if it's still alive?" Not helpful!
Thursday, October 8, 2015
Can she please just remain this innocent forever?
For our spelling lesson, I was reviewing with the girls when to use "k" and when to use "ck" at the end of a word. The rule is that "ck" comes only directly after a short vowel.
Primus was being silly and decided to should out various "short vowel-ck" words.
"Stick! Sick! Truck! Duck! F*ck!"
Then she stopped, giggled at herself, and declared "Oops! That's not a word!"
Can she please just remain this innocent forever?
Primus was being silly and decided to should out various "short vowel-ck" words.
"Stick! Sick! Truck! Duck! F*ck!"
Then she stopped, giggled at herself, and declared "Oops! That's not a word!"
Can she please just remain this innocent forever?
Monday, September 28, 2015
Homeschool Means...#14
...feeling proud of the kids for deciding on their own to be scientists by mixing up various concoctions. It also means trying to not stress about the food being "wasted" or the mess being made
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Friday, September 18, 2015
Spouse and Family Support Guide, Chapter 6 Bear One Another's Burdens
My intro from Chapter 1: "Last semester Hubby had a class on Tuesday nights which made it difficult for me to attend the Family Support Group that I used to facilitate. But now I have started going back and am loving it!
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
Chapter 6 Bear One Another's Burdens
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
Chapter 6 Bear One Another's Burdens
I'm so glad I decided to rededicate
myself to going to the Family Support Group regularly! I need that
spiritually uplifting opportunity every week. It's like attending a
testimony meeting every Tuesday. It feels good to be able to serve
and support others in their trials, and also feel unconditional love,
support, compassion, and understanding from others towards me. It
lifts my spirit! It helps me always remember God's love for me. It
helps me feel motivated to do the things I know I need to do, not
just for the benefit of becoming closer to my Heavenly Father, but
also because I feel accountable in a way to these other people. They
encourage me to be better. I want them to be proud of me and I want
to be strong so that I may help them become strong.
I'm thankful for my Bishop, for his
wisdom, inspiration, and counsel from Heavenly Father.
I think pride is ultimately the
obstacle in my way for seeking support in my trials.
I love the Addiction Recovery Program
and the Family Support Group!
I love the caveat that the reading gave
under “Priesthood and Relief Society Leaders.” It says to be
mindful that leaders may not understand addiction. So while they can
bless, guide, and give us direction through inspiration from the
Lord, we may have to help them understand what is really going on in
our lives. How can our leaders know we need more
guidance unless we tell them that!
I can be a support to others passing
through similar trials as me by first strengthening myself. I can't
lift someone up unless I am on higher ground by being more
spiritually/emotionally healthy myself. Then I can testify of truth
and of God's love and Christ's Atonement and how that has changed my
life.
I love my husband as I love my own
soul, like Jonathan swore to David. He is my best friend, one that I
can turn to for support more than anyone else, save Heavenly Father
and the Savior. As his wife and friend, I want to buoy him up, as
well, in his trials.
“...and they did submit cheerfully
and with patience to all the will of the Lord.” This is so hard for
me!
Who does God want me to succor, lift,
and strengthen?
bear one anothers burdens = be a friend
The Savior is my perfect friend.
The Holy Ghost becomes a constant
companion with faith and obedience.
I am not the Savior's servant, but His
friend.
Being a good example is being a good
friend.
Monday, August 31, 2015
Homeschooling Means... #13
...the girls get to take a long weekend vacation to Lake Tahoe with grandparents to visit great-grandparents. Mommy may still send along schoolwork to be done, but it won't be too much because seeing new sights and visiting with family is more important.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Thursday, August 27, 2015
Easy Oven Chili Burritos
Tonight I started doubling this quick recipe before I realized, "Hubby hates this and I don't remember if the kids like it!" So I put half in a pan for us and the other half in a disposable foil pan and started praying to know who I should deliver this meal to. I decided to take it to a neighbor who recently had a new baby. I also took it as an opportunity to invite them to my upcoming Tent Town. They may just throw the dinner in the trash, but it's the thought that counts, right? :)
This really is an easy meal to throw together from things I keep in my pantry and fridge most days. And the kids ended up loving it! Even Quartus inhaled it without hesitation. Shredded cheese may be his favorite food ever, so I'm sure that helped.
Mix together:
1 can chili with beans
1/2 can diced tomatoes
Divide chili mixture between about 5 flour tortillas. In each tortilla, also add a handful or two of shredded cheddar cheese (tonight I ran out and had to use some mozzarella, too.)
Roll up tortillas and place them side by side in 9 inch square pan.
In blender, puree the other 1/2 can of tomatoes. Pour over the top of burritos. Cover with more shredded cheese.
Cover with foil and bake in 350 degree oven for about a half hour (until cheese is melted and middle is warm.)
This really is an easy meal to throw together from things I keep in my pantry and fridge most days. And the kids ended up loving it! Even Quartus inhaled it without hesitation. Shredded cheese may be his favorite food ever, so I'm sure that helped.
Mix together:
1 can chili with beans
1/2 can diced tomatoes
Divide chili mixture between about 5 flour tortillas. In each tortilla, also add a handful or two of shredded cheddar cheese (tonight I ran out and had to use some mozzarella, too.)
Roll up tortillas and place them side by side in 9 inch square pan.
In blender, puree the other 1/2 can of tomatoes. Pour over the top of burritos. Cover with more shredded cheese.
Cover with foil and bake in 350 degree oven for about a half hour (until cheese is melted and middle is warm.)
Wednesday, August 26, 2015
Poetry Lesson: Chiasmus
We had the most interesting poetry lesson we've ever had by studying chiasmus poetry in the Old Testament.
In the morning, I had been doing my personal scripture study in the Old Testament and read about Hebrew literary styles and poetry in this study guide.
Many years ago we had touched on chiasmus in Seminary while studying the Book of Mormon. (The fact that the Book of Mormon contains several chiasmus- not fully understood and discussed by Western scholars until the 1930's- is used as further evidence of the validity of the B of M as true scripture, and not simply the literary work of Joseph Smith, a man with a limited education.) I thought that was pretty cool at the time and it excited me again to learn about this beautiful literary style in the context of the Old Testament.
When you read a few verses and realize you're reading a chiasmus, it feels like discovering some buried treasure. Armed with the information and examples in the two links above, I quickly planned a fun lesson for the kids.
We started by discussing general information about chiasmus. Then I copied several small examples from the scriptures on the white-board and helped the kids identify how the lines match up with each other, even if the same exact words aren't used each time.
At first reading, they didn't understand what I meant by saying that the opposite lines matched with each other. It was awesome to see their eyes light up as I pointed, numbered, and reread the matching lines. When it clicked for them, I could see them get excited.
After several scriptural examples, we worked together to write one on the board. Then I turned them loose to write their own. Primus chose "Family Care" as her topic and wrote all of it completely on her own.
Secundus decided to write about her pet fish, "Rainbow." I wrote the first half as she dictated to me her ideas. Then I helped guide her just a little as she flipped it around and wrote the second half.
I was amused that Tertius really latched onto the idea that chiasmus was used in scripture. I guess he figured that meant his chiasmus needed to be about God. He dictated to me the first half, listing things that God doesn't want us to do. Then to write the second half, I would point to a line and ask him, "what's another way to say this?" His frowny-faced illustration was a nice touch.
Tuesday, August 25, 2015
Co-Dependency Support
I met a new person at the Spouse and Family Support Group tonight and wanted to make sure she is able to find the link to my Co-Dependency Reading List. So here it is!
Also, if you want to see everything else I have written on the subject, click "Addiction Recovery Program" under labels on my side bar.
Also, if you want to see everything else I have written on the subject, click "Addiction Recovery Program" under labels on my side bar.
Thursday, August 20, 2015
Spouse and Family Support Guide, Ch 5 Working Out Our Own Salvation
My intro from Chapter 1: "Last semester Hubby had a class on Tuesday nights which made it difficult for me to attend the Family Support Group that I used to facilitate. But now I have started going back and am loving it!
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
Chapter 5 Working Out Our Own Salvation
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
Chapter 5 Working Out Our Own Salvation
“Forced obedience yields no
blessings.” True with spouses and children!
When we desire to support a loved one,
it's because we love them. Because we love them, we want them to
have peace and joy. We think we can give that to them, but we can't.
They have to use their own agency to CHOOSE for themselves to turn
to the Savior. We cannot override their agency and force them to do
anything. That's not God's plan!
I can't force others to change. I
can't make others make right choices. Trying to change others only
brings me pain, frustration, despair. But I CAN change myself. I
CAN turn myself towards my Savior. Jesus will heal me if I let Him.
I let Him by placing my loved ones and my burdens at His feet and
surrendering myself in faith to Him, trusting that He knows best in
all cases.
I have to focus on myself and take care
of myself (physically, emotionally, spiritually) in order to be fit
and in a good position to be Christ's hands in serving others. But
as I do that, I need to make sure I am heeding revelation and serving
others as Christ would have me do, not the way I think should
be done. Otherwise, I end up back in the codependent habit of trying
to override others' agency.
To take care of myself, physically,
emotionally, and spiritually, I need to be better about eating
healthy, exercising, and studying and pondering the scriptures.
I see all of life as a big balancing
act. One thing that we need to balance is service to others vs.
taking care of ourselves. We are constantly told to “lose
ourselves in service” and to be selfless. But I also need to
remember that I cannot fix everything for other people. I cannot fix
others. I cannot take away others' agency. And I need to focus on
myself. Take care of my own physical, spiritual, and emotional needs
so that I can be a better servant to others from a place of strength.
Partaking of the Sacrament is one time
that is entirely for ME. It is not a time to think of others and
their problems. The ordinance of the Sacrament is the time for ME to
talk with my Savior and rededicate MYSELF to following Him.
Participation in temple ordinances is a
time when I am providing selfless service to others on the other side
of the veil. But I also go to the temple for MYSELF to fill MY
spiritual cup and receive revelation for ME. We need balance!
I can be sure of the Lord's promises.
Establish a house of order-a house of
God. All things balanced. All things done with wisdom.
How do I put God first in my life? I
need to reprioritize morning personal scripture study and prayer. I
should not let myself get distracted with doing dishes or any chores
that I should have done the night before.
The Church is constantly improving and
seeking to better align itself with God's doctrine and the purpose of
His church as we gain more knowledge and insight into His will and
plan. Therefore, I would rather study and focus on the words of
recent Prophets and Apostles rather than those of the early Saints of
this dispensation. So what if there's “precedence” for
this-or-that?? It went away for a reason. I have faith that that
“reason” is revelation. I'm so thankful for General Conference!
Monday, August 17, 2015
Calzones
Tonight we had some friends over for dinner so I made one of my favorite meals. They all said they loved it, so either it really is good, or my friends are just too nice. One asked for the recipe because her husband ate three. So there's that.
Sorry, I'm no good at tutorials. But here is the recipe! I was introduced to this by a lovely woman in my ward who had the Activity Day Girls make these for me after I had a baby. I've only altered it slightly since then.
The kids inhaled the leftovers for lunch today and I didn't think fast enough to get a picture, so this is the best I've got. They turn out to be rectangular in shape and this is one of the short ends.
Calzones
preheat oven 425
Mix
in bowl:
1
cup ricotta cheese
1
egg, beaten
¼
cup Parmesan cheese
1
cup shredded mozzarella cheese
1
pound cooked and drained
Italian sausage
On
floured surface roll out 2 cans Pillsbury pizza dough.
Cut each in 4 pieces.
Fill
with a little bit of sauce (see recipe below) and cheese filling.
Fold
and seal edges with water.
Place on ungreased
baking sheet that is sprinkled with cornmeal.
Bake
12-15 min.
Serve with extra sauce.
Sauce
Mix together and simmer
in saucepan for about 45 min:
1 can (28 oz) crushed
tomatoes
¼ tsp garlic powder
1 tsp Italian
seasoning
2 Tbs olive oil
salt/pepper to
taste
Sunday, August 16, 2015
No Summer Is Complete Without a Trip to the Beach
Or when a beach trip isn't possible, a crafty snack is a good alternative. :)
Remember how you can make "dirt cups" with chocolate pudding, Cool-whip, and crushed Oreos?
Instead we used vanilla pudding, Cool-whip, and Golden Oreos. That formed the basis of each kids' beach. Then crushed vanilla wafers was the sand layered on top.
Blue Jello became the ocean, with Swedish Fish splashing in the waves.
What I did:
1. mix the pudding with milk (the kids often help me with this, but not this time)
2. stir the Cool-whip and crushed Oreos into the pudding
3. prepare the Jello (the kids often help me with this, but not this time)
What Primus did:
1. crush the Oreos (I doubled bagged them in a ziplock for her.)
What all the kids did:
1. scoop the "beach" onto their plates
2. scoop the Jello onto their plates
3. crush their own small bag of Nilla wafers and sprinkle on top of beach
4. add Swedish Fish to "water." Some of them buried their fish under the Jello, and some made them look like the fish were jumping out of the water.
Remember how you can make "dirt cups" with chocolate pudding, Cool-whip, and crushed Oreos?
Instead we used vanilla pudding, Cool-whip, and Golden Oreos. That formed the basis of each kids' beach. Then crushed vanilla wafers was the sand layered on top.
Blue Jello became the ocean, with Swedish Fish splashing in the waves.
What I did:
1. mix the pudding with milk (the kids often help me with this, but not this time)
2. stir the Cool-whip and crushed Oreos into the pudding
3. prepare the Jello (the kids often help me with this, but not this time)
What Primus did:
1. crush the Oreos (I doubled bagged them in a ziplock for her.)
What all the kids did:
1. scoop the "beach" onto their plates
2. scoop the Jello onto their plates
3. crush their own small bag of Nilla wafers and sprinkle on top of beach
4. add Swedish Fish to "water." Some of them buried their fish under the Jello, and some made them look like the fish were jumping out of the water.
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#12
...you count your school as successful when your 7 year old decides that she wants to learn how to do magic and then fills her library bag with books on the subject.
Bonus: She has no desire to become a magician, she just wants to be a magic teacher.
Cute side note: Since her speech isn't perfect, she gets mixed up and instead of "magician," she says, "mugician." Like a combination of musician and magician.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Bonus: She has no desire to become a magician, she just wants to be a magic teacher.
Cute side note: Since her speech isn't perfect, she gets mixed up and instead of "magician," she says, "mugician." Like a combination of musician and magician.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Thursday, August 13, 2015
First Day of School 2015
Thanks to a fun tradition (our Schultuten), the first day of school is exciting! It's like Christmas!
After they opened their Schultuten and ate breakfast, I did calendar time with the boys then spelling review with the girls. They each also had a small independent assignment.
After that, we did "history" time, which consisted of the girls practicing our favorite Horrible Histories sketch (eventually we will record and post it). Then we read a story book about an origami girl coming to life, a la Pinocchio, because we ended last school year learning about Japan.
Before lunch we did "P.E." at the bowling alley, which was empty! After lunch we did a little bit of our new literature studies and a quick, messy art project.
Today was a success and a great way to start the school year! Primus kept telling me several times that "Today is the best first day of school ever!" I think it helped that she won at bowling.
Primus, 4th grade |
Secundus, 2nd grade |
Tertius, Kinder |
Quartus, 2 year old |
Spouse and Family Support Guide, Ch 4 Draw Near Unto Me
My intro from Chapter 1: "Last semester Hubby had a class on Tuesday nights which made it difficult for me to attend the Family Support Group that I used to facilitate. But now I have started going back and am loving it!
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
I need to take care of my spirit just
like I need to take care of my body. My body needs sleep, healthy
food, exercise. My spirit needs faith, feasting on the scriptures,
prayer, etc.
It is easier for me to receive
revelation, and easier to recognize it when I receive it, when I am
doing all I can to be closer to the Lord. When I am praying
sincerely every morning and night, and when I am studying and
pondering the scriptures and other gospel resources every day.
Journal writing helps, too.
Taking the sacrament is my opportunity
to reflect on myself and my own conduct. The sacrament and renewing
my covenants has nothing to do with anyone else. It's just between
me and my Savior. So when I take the sacrament, I should be focusing
not on what blessings my loved ones need (that can be done in prayer
at a different time), but rather on what transgressions I have done
and what I need to do to better align myself with His will.
He knows my heart.
When I am in the temple, I feel
profound peace. I feel that everything is ok, there is nothing to
worry about, God is in control. I need to go often so that I can
continually be bolstered by that testimony so I can get through the
struggles and trials in between.
I'm still learning to recognize the
promptings of the Holy Ghost vs. my own ideas and emotions. It is
easier to feel confident about it when I am doing what I need to to
feel close to my Heavenly Father. And I put a lot of faith in the
scripture that talks about a burning in the bosom vs. a stupor of
thought.
“Did I not speak peace to your mind
concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from
God?”
The Holy Ghost speaks to our minds and
to our hearts.
The Spirit enlightens our minds and
fills our souls with joy.
Heavenly Father, through the Spirit,
teaches and guides us with peace and joy, not FEAR.
“If ye will NOT HARDEN your hearts,
and ask me in FAITH, BELIEVING that ye shall receive, with diligence
in KEEPING THE COMMANDMENTS, surely these things shall be made known
unto you.”
Scripture study, prayer, and fasting
are needed to receive revelation.
My testimony is strong even though I
haven't received “frequent, miraculous, or strong impressions.”
It has grown line upon line over my whole life.
I have to CHOOSE to be faithful,
humble, and obedient to God's laws as I understand them. THAT is how
I will receive revelation and a testimony of the truth.
What am I sacrificing to serve and
bless others?
Holy Ghost = feeling of light and joy;
calm, quiet, peaceful. Confusion, doubt, anxiety, fear all come from
darkness.
When we perceive the light through the
fog, we can only take a few steps at a time. We can't see the end of
the path.
In addition to all the obvious and
oft-repeated things we should do to increase our spirituality and be
more receptive to the Spirit, we also need to take care of our
physical bodies! Taking care of the temple of my spirit
“increase our capacity to receive and understand revelation.”
I need to be better about recording
direction, inspiration, and revelation I receive.
“Sanctify yourselves” = keep the
commandments
I'm thankful for good friends that took
me up on my crazy idea of exchanging babysitting each month so we
each have a guaranteed date night/temple night. And I'm especially
thankful that they are so good about remembering it! If it were up
to me, I'm sure we would frequently miss our temple night due to my
own failure to write it down and plan for it each month!
Thank the Lord for the “trust He
places in us when He gives us the opportunity to overcome
difficulties.” Ask what am I supposed to learn from this
experience?
I need to stop complaining!
Friday, August 7, 2015
One personal story of addiction, and another on the way...
I want to share a blogger with you who is very special to me. My friend-in-real life, Alysha, blogs at Millennial Mormon Mom. Read her, bookmark her, subscribe to her.
We have been attending the Spouse and Family Support Group (part of the Addiction Recovery Program) together and hearing about her journey in life is really inspiring to me. She's decided to write about her experiences with the addictions of herself, her spouse, and a parent.
She begins her new series with this wonderful piece: "Why I Chose to Blog About Addiction Recovery."
Through the Family Support Group, I have met countless other wonderful people who have struggled in the depths of despair because of the addiction of a loved one. Many women have been drawn to our group because of their husbands' Pornography Addiction. Follow that link for information from a secular source, Fight the New Drug, about how pornography addiction is like any other drug addiction.
Pornography addiction and how it harms individuals, spouses, and families, is something I am fired up about! I would love to share one of their stories here on my blog. I'm working with one couple in particular and hope to post that heartbreaking, yet touching piece soon.
If your life has been touched by addiction, whether yours or a loved one's, whether pornography or something else, please consider attending a support group near you. And if you would like to share your story here on my blog, contact me (shirleypretzel at gmail dot com). I fully support the confidentiality and anonymity that are so important to making the Addiction Recovery Program a safe place to share. Therefore, your name and personal information would be kept completely secret.
Addiction and Co-dependency thrive in darkness and isolation. The more we talk about it, the more we realize that we are not alone! And the more we talk about it, the more we can help ourselves and others rise out of the darkness toward peace, hope, and healing!
We have been attending the Spouse and Family Support Group (part of the Addiction Recovery Program) together and hearing about her journey in life is really inspiring to me. She's decided to write about her experiences with the addictions of herself, her spouse, and a parent.
She begins her new series with this wonderful piece: "Why I Chose to Blog About Addiction Recovery."
Through the Family Support Group, I have met countless other wonderful people who have struggled in the depths of despair because of the addiction of a loved one. Many women have been drawn to our group because of their husbands' Pornography Addiction. Follow that link for information from a secular source, Fight the New Drug, about how pornography addiction is like any other drug addiction.
Pornography addiction and how it harms individuals, spouses, and families, is something I am fired up about! I would love to share one of their stories here on my blog. I'm working with one couple in particular and hope to post that heartbreaking, yet touching piece soon.
If your life has been touched by addiction, whether yours or a loved one's, whether pornography or something else, please consider attending a support group near you. And if you would like to share your story here on my blog, contact me (shirleypretzel at gmail dot com). I fully support the confidentiality and anonymity that are so important to making the Addiction Recovery Program a safe place to share. Therefore, your name and personal information would be kept completely secret.
Addiction and Co-dependency thrive in darkness and isolation. The more we talk about it, the more we realize that we are not alone! And the more we talk about it, the more we can help ourselves and others rise out of the darkness toward peace, hope, and healing!
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
My Nephew Was Bullied
Today my sister-in-law, "Sarah," joined us at the park. We weren't there long before I noticed that some new kid in a red hat punched my 8 year old nephew in the arm. Then I watched as "Red Hat", his friend "Blondie," and his sister chased him around the playground.
With my four, Sarah's four, four of our friends, plus extra kids we didn't know, there was a lot of children of all ages running around the playground today. My nephew, "Andrew," his brother, and Tertius always play really rough together. From where we were sitting, I couldn't tell if that was what was going on or if these new kids were being mean. Therefore I turned to Sarah and told her what I saw so we could keep an eye on the situation.
After seeing them chase him some more and whack him with toy handcuffs, it became clear that Andrew was not playing with these mean kids.
At one point, Andrew had moved to a different area and was minding his own business, playing with my kids. Red Hat strolled over, took off his hat, and whacked Andrew with it! I could feel the Mama Bear inside me start to rise. I wanted to run over there and pounce on that kid!
Andrew, though, is no sissy, so he quickly yanked the hat away and whacked the kid back. At the same time Sarah jumped up and separated the boys. Andrew's older brother and sister were instructed to shield and defend their brother and tell the bullies to leave him alone.
After that, we hovered a little and continued to keep a close eye on the situation. As I was standing right there, just a couple feet away, Red Hat and Blondie walked past Andrew to stick their tongues out at him and tease him by saying, "Greenie Grinch," or something equally stupid and nonsensical. Each time, Andrew's older brother and sister stepped up.
A little later Red Hat was sitting with his posse, which had grown to include a few much younger girls who didn't really know what was going on, and Red Hat's sister noticed Andrew climbing up a slide nearby. She declared, "Look, he's going up the ramp! Let's get him!" I was standing very close to them and just said, "Ya know, there's lots of adults around here watching." I think my niece said something to him, too, that was more direct.
So the group ran off into the trees next to the playground to plot how to lure Andrew away so they can "get him" or something like that (my niece listened in a little.)
Thankfully, nothing more happened. A little later, Blondie started playing with our group of kids and had a really fun time. Apparently Red Hat took issue with that and claimed our kids were "stealing his friend." The group told him that "well, if you act like a jerk, you won't have many friends."
The whole thing was so crazy! Even a couple hours later, as I thought about the situation, my blood pressure would rise. I was never bullied as a child but Hubby was, mercilessly, all through elementary and middle school. It's something I don't think I had ever truly witnessed before, outside of movies.
Perhaps we should have told the kids' mothers what their little darlings were doing. But I'm a fan of letting kids figure out things on their own, as long as nothing physical is going on (one more punch and this Mama Bear would have dragged the brat so quick to his mother!)
It wasn't my child directly involved so I definitely let my sister-in-law take the lead. I think it was a good learning experience for all the kids involved (well, I don't know if Red Hat and his sister learned anything...)
Andrew hopefully learned how to stand up for himself and not put up with crap. His brother and sister learned to stick by their brother and defend their family. My kids got to see what bullying looks like first-hand and learn what to do in that kind of situation.
With my four, Sarah's four, four of our friends, plus extra kids we didn't know, there was a lot of children of all ages running around the playground today. My nephew, "Andrew," his brother, and Tertius always play really rough together. From where we were sitting, I couldn't tell if that was what was going on or if these new kids were being mean. Therefore I turned to Sarah and told her what I saw so we could keep an eye on the situation.
After seeing them chase him some more and whack him with toy handcuffs, it became clear that Andrew was not playing with these mean kids.
At one point, Andrew had moved to a different area and was minding his own business, playing with my kids. Red Hat strolled over, took off his hat, and whacked Andrew with it! I could feel the Mama Bear inside me start to rise. I wanted to run over there and pounce on that kid!
Andrew, though, is no sissy, so he quickly yanked the hat away and whacked the kid back. At the same time Sarah jumped up and separated the boys. Andrew's older brother and sister were instructed to shield and defend their brother and tell the bullies to leave him alone.
After that, we hovered a little and continued to keep a close eye on the situation. As I was standing right there, just a couple feet away, Red Hat and Blondie walked past Andrew to stick their tongues out at him and tease him by saying, "Greenie Grinch," or something equally stupid and nonsensical. Each time, Andrew's older brother and sister stepped up.
A little later Red Hat was sitting with his posse, which had grown to include a few much younger girls who didn't really know what was going on, and Red Hat's sister noticed Andrew climbing up a slide nearby. She declared, "Look, he's going up the ramp! Let's get him!" I was standing very close to them and just said, "Ya know, there's lots of adults around here watching." I think my niece said something to him, too, that was more direct.
So the group ran off into the trees next to the playground to plot how to lure Andrew away so they can "get him" or something like that (my niece listened in a little.)
Thankfully, nothing more happened. A little later, Blondie started playing with our group of kids and had a really fun time. Apparently Red Hat took issue with that and claimed our kids were "stealing his friend." The group told him that "well, if you act like a jerk, you won't have many friends."
The whole thing was so crazy! Even a couple hours later, as I thought about the situation, my blood pressure would rise. I was never bullied as a child but Hubby was, mercilessly, all through elementary and middle school. It's something I don't think I had ever truly witnessed before, outside of movies.
Perhaps we should have told the kids' mothers what their little darlings were doing. But I'm a fan of letting kids figure out things on their own, as long as nothing physical is going on (one more punch and this Mama Bear would have dragged the brat so quick to his mother!)
It wasn't my child directly involved so I definitely let my sister-in-law take the lead. I think it was a good learning experience for all the kids involved (well, I don't know if Red Hat and his sister learned anything...)
Andrew hopefully learned how to stand up for himself and not put up with crap. His brother and sister learned to stick by their brother and defend their family. My kids got to see what bullying looks like first-hand and learn what to do in that kind of situation.
Spouse and Family Support Guide, Ch 3 He Will Take upon Him the Pains and the Sicknesses of His People
My intro from Chapter 1: "Last semester Hubby had a class on Tuesday nights which made it difficult for me to attend the Family Support Group that I used to facilitate. But now I have started going back and am loving it!
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
Chapter 3 He Will Take upon Him the Pains and the Sicknesses of His People
"I used to go primarily to help other people. But now I have to choose to go for myself. It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting. You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!
"I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study. I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide. This is the manual we discuss in the meetings. I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section. And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.
"These will not be my unedited journal entries. The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings. I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter. You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!"
Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.
Chapter 3 He Will Take upon Him the Pains and the Sicknesses of His People
Christ took upon him not just my sins,
but my PAINS and SICKNESSES. Which I believe includes pains and
sicknesses of the heart.
There is a difference between believing
in Heavenly Father and Jesus, and believing in Their promises. If I
believe that Heavenly Father and Jesus are real beings, that doesn't
necessarily mean that I believe they actually care about me.
I
believe that they exist and that they know me AND love me. I believe
that they love my loved ones AND me. I believe they bless those
that seek them INCLUDING me. I believe that they keep their promises
to others AND me. I need to not lose faith in that when Their
timetable is not the same as mine.
The healing power of Christ's Atonement
“is available for every affliction in mortality.”
We have had limited income for over 5 years
now. These 5 years have been very hard. It has been a huge struggle
for me to be patient, faithful, and optimistic during this time. But
I have had large portions of time (and getting larger and more
frequent) of feeling at peace and content. This is only possible
through my Savior.
The thing that prevents me from coming
unto Christ and exercising faith in Him so that He can heal me is my
pride. The thought that I can do it on my own. That I should be
able to fix things by my own power. But really I have no control
over so much that happens in this life. I have to let go of that
pride, put my life at His feet, exercise faith in Him, and patiently
wait on His plan for me. This is Steps 1-3 of ARP! I can't, He can,
I think I'll let Him.
I think “lay your burdens at the feet
of the Savior” means to go to Him in prayer and admit, “I'm
powerless. My way isn't working. I give this burden to thee. I
commit to being patient and following thy counsel on the matter, even
though I don't understand why.”
I don't understand all the details of what will
happen in the Spirit World prior to the Resurrection. But it is so
nice to hear an apostle of the Lord state with confidence that there
is still time for improvement even after death.
A nursing mother CANNOT forget her
sucking child. Just like the Savior CANNOT forget and forsake us for
He has a very permanent, physical connection to us.
Christ came into the world to “save
all men if they will hearken unto his voice.” He came to save us
from death. He came to save us from hell. He came to save us from
the pain, despair, loneliness, grief, anxiety that we experience in
mortality.
“Behold, mine arm of mercy is
extended towards you...” He's just waiting there, holding out His
hand to rescue us. We just need to put away our pride, exercise
faith, and reach up!
Key for repentance: Confess sins and
Forsake them.
Jesus suffered so we wouldn't have to.
He doesn't want us to suffer!
Satan wants us to be confused. He
wants us to be depressed. He wants us to doubt.
Grace: “Divine means of help or
strength, given through the bounteous mercy and love of Jesus
Christ.”
Without Him (our Savior Jesus Christ),
we are truly nothing. Without Him, we would not be resurrected,
would not be able to repent of our transgressions, would not have the
strength to endure or accomplish what we need to in this life.
Without Him, our lives would be lost.
Grace = enabling power
We put our selves in darkness by
our choices.
He loves all of His creations. He
especially loves us, His crowning creation, made on the 6th
day after all else was prepared.
In my "seasons of distress and grief", my soul has, can, and will find relief
when I lay my burdens at His feet in sincere prayer. I also love
that the hymn calls is “seasons” of distress. Seasons come and
go. They are constantly changing. We know that they will pass away,
and we know that they will come again in their due time. Just like
our trials and tribulations. “This too shall pass.” New or
similar trials will come again later, but we know that they are with
us for only a short time in the eternal perspective.
Monday, August 3, 2015
Homeschooling Means...#11
...dragging the kids along to check out the Korean market I've heard so much about to look for poi, and calling it a field trip.
Probably the most exciting part was looking at the live catfish, crab, and lobster. Unfortunately they had no live turtles that day. They sadly had no poi, but we'll be going back again. The kids loved getting treats to taste from other countries.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Probably the most exciting part was looking at the live catfish, crab, and lobster. Unfortunately they had no live turtles that day. They sadly had no poi, but we'll be going back again. The kids loved getting treats to taste from other countries.
(This series is meant to be mostly lighthearted and fun. Some may be serious, but most will be silly, braggy, or of the keepin'-it-real variety. Not every homeschool is the same. And some of these things could be said by public school parents. This is just to highlight MY experience with MY homeschool and MY children. Enjoy these little insights into our life and feel free to share your own "Homeschooling means..." in the comments!)
Thursday, July 30, 2015
Two Quick Tips for Distar
Click the link on the sidebar for "Distar" under "Labels" to understand what this reading program I'm talking about is.
1. Take Wiggle Breaks
One thing that I love about Distar is that each lesson is pretty short. But once your child approaches the middle of the book, the stories get longer and the child is expected to read them twice in a row. That can be hard for short attention spans and wiggly bottoms! A little bit of physical activity, and then he can focus on the task at hand better.
As soon as Tertius is done reading the story the first time, I have him stand up and do jumping jacks. He doesn't know how to do them correctly, but at least it's getting his body moving and blood pumping. He thinks they're really fun, too. I used to just have him do 10. But recently he started insisting on doing more. The first day he wanted to do 11. Then the next day was 12. He is now up to doing 18 jumping jacks before sitting to read the story for a second time.
2. Skip the Writing Section
I'm sure it's meant to serve a wonderful purpose. And I'm sure it's great for some families. But I have always skipped it.
Once my kids are done reading the story for the second time and have answered the comprehension questions while looking at the picture, they're done. Everyone of them was eager to jump up and do something else. And that "something else" does not include sitting still and putting pencil to blank paper.
Instead, I teach my Kindergartners to write their letters using colorful handwriting books in the D'nealian/Modern Manuscript style (I can never remember what it's actually officially called-it's the one where all the printed letters have little "kicks" at the end as a way to ease into cursive in later grades.)
I had a setback...
I've been so good for so long. Almost 3 months. I haven't yelled at my kids at all for almost three months. I haven't been speaking in a permanently saccharine-sweet voice, but I have been in control of my tone of voice. Our home has been a happier, calmer place where the Holy Spirit has been able to be present.
But then I slipped up.
Two of the children were playing in the living room. When these two are together they can go very quickly from happily playing to fighting. On this day, child One accidentally hit child Two in the face with a toy. One quickly apologized. But Two didn't hear over the sounds of it's own screaming and exaggerated crying as it hit One with a balloon in retaliation.
I like to let them try to figure things out on their own, but it was clear this time that I needed to step in. I told them both to sit down and began talking to Two about the situation. Two refused to listen to what I had to say and kept defending itself, talking over me, being rude, etc. Very typical for this child.
I finally told Two to go to a different room. If Two is not ready to listen to me in matters of discipline, then Two just needs to go to the bedroom and give us both space to calm down before we can talk with more level heads.
On this day, I let Two push me too far. This child refused to leave the room. I was frustrated and sick of not being able to get a word in edgewise without the arguing and backtalk. So I chose to command the situation and screamed, "GOOD BYE!"
That scared Two enough to shut it's mouth and leave. But then I felt horrible. All that divine help I have had! The miracle I had received! I felt like I had been walking on a clear path in a beautiful meadow but then suddenly decided to jump onto the dark, twisting, rocky, dangerous path to the left.
Thankfully after a couple minutes both of us were calmer and had a really good discussion. We both did some repenting. And then we both felt better.
This ended up being a good learning opportunity for the both of us. Two learned that Mommy is willing to admit when I screw up, and that I'm trying to be better. I learned, again, that I need to continue to rely on my Heavenly Father and on my Savior Jesus Christ daily. Hourly! I need His guidance to know how best to parent, teach, and discipline each of my children. I need His grace as I try to exercise greater faith and patience. And I need His Atonement because unlike Him, I am not perfect! If I sincerely repent He makes it possible for me to walk once again in that beautiful meadow toward His kingdom.
But then I slipped up.
Two of the children were playing in the living room. When these two are together they can go very quickly from happily playing to fighting. On this day, child One accidentally hit child Two in the face with a toy. One quickly apologized. But Two didn't hear over the sounds of it's own screaming and exaggerated crying as it hit One with a balloon in retaliation.
I like to let them try to figure things out on their own, but it was clear this time that I needed to step in. I told them both to sit down and began talking to Two about the situation. Two refused to listen to what I had to say and kept defending itself, talking over me, being rude, etc. Very typical for this child.
I finally told Two to go to a different room. If Two is not ready to listen to me in matters of discipline, then Two just needs to go to the bedroom and give us both space to calm down before we can talk with more level heads.
On this day, I let Two push me too far. This child refused to leave the room. I was frustrated and sick of not being able to get a word in edgewise without the arguing and backtalk. So I chose to command the situation and screamed, "GOOD BYE!"
That scared Two enough to shut it's mouth and leave. But then I felt horrible. All that divine help I have had! The miracle I had received! I felt like I had been walking on a clear path in a beautiful meadow but then suddenly decided to jump onto the dark, twisting, rocky, dangerous path to the left.
Thankfully after a couple minutes both of us were calmer and had a really good discussion. We both did some repenting. And then we both felt better.
This ended up being a good learning opportunity for the both of us. Two learned that Mommy is willing to admit when I screw up, and that I'm trying to be better. I learned, again, that I need to continue to rely on my Heavenly Father and on my Savior Jesus Christ daily. Hourly! I need His guidance to know how best to parent, teach, and discipline each of my children. I need His grace as I try to exercise greater faith and patience. And I need His Atonement because unlike Him, I am not perfect! If I sincerely repent He makes it possible for me to walk once again in that beautiful meadow toward His kingdom.
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