Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Spouse and Family Support Guide, Ch 2 Shake Off the Chains with Which Ye Are Bound

My intro from last week: Last semester Hubby had a class on Tuesday nights which made it difficult for me to attend the Family Support Group that I used to facilitate.  But now I have started going back and am loving it!

I used to go primarily to help other people.  But now I have to choose to go for myself.  It's a wonderful mid-week gospel study and testimony meeting.  You don't have to have an addiction or know someone who has an addiction to benefit from this group!

I'm trying to be better (again) about my personal nightly scripture study.  I've decided that every night I am going to study the Spouse and Family Support Guide.  This is the manual we discuss in the meetings.  I'm journaling my answers to the discussion questions, and thoughts I have as I study the Personal Learning and Application section.  And since I do better at sticking to things when I have outside accountability and feel obligated, I'm going to blog my journals here.

These will not be my unedited journal entries.  The really personal stuff will be saved for my own reflection and for sharing in the confidential meetings.  I also won't be including the many, many quotes that touched my heart and that I highlighted in the additional readings linked at the end of each chapter.  You're going to have to go read and find those gems yourself!

Please follow the link, read along, and share your own thoughts in the comments if you feel so inspired.

For too long I think I felt some responsibility, not for the way my loved ones act, but for fixing them. I felt like I was the one who could understand, reach, change, and soften them. It was draining. Beating my head against the wall didn't work and it didn't work and it didn't work and it was only was causing harm to my own life and family. I finally had to realize that and step away. 

When my relationship with Heavenly Father is strong, I find it easier to be optimistic and patient through trials. I know that I am His child and that He loves me and my family. Because of this love, I know that He wants what's best for me. Sometimes what's best for me is that I learn difficult lessons. So I have to trust and have faith that all will come out better in the end.

I can use my agency to choose to move forward with positive experiences for my children rather than dwelling on pain.

I will be punished for my own negative actions, and not for the actions of anyone else. 

Because of my divine nature, I am capable of amazing things.

God is not a dumb idol. He is a living being who knows our needs and hears our cries.

We had agency, the freedom of choice, from the beginning.

I had no idea “agency” was not defined as we know it in the dictionary!
“Agency is the ability and privilege God gives us to choose and 'to act for ourselves and not to be acted upon' Agency is to act with accountability and responsibility for our actions.”

Satan's plan wasn't a plan of love, but of rebellion “for it would have denied us our agency.”

In this life, we sometimes use our agency to give up our agency.
Christ had to exercise agency to be our Savior.

I want my home to be filled with FHE, family prayer, family scripture study, etc to make my home an “incubator for spiritual growth" I want my home to be more spiritual.

The Atonement is available to me. The Atonement is available to my family. The Atonement is available to my friends.

I need to put my trust in God CONTINUALLY like the stripling warriors.

“Choose to put everything, literally everything, on the altar before Him.” Reminds me of Step 3.

B of M prophets prayed for strength (the enabling power of the Atonement) rather than praying for trials to be taken away. I need to pray for strength to overcome/endure my challenges like they did.

Sister Bednar experienced the same as me: unending morning sickness in pregnancy. I prayed for that trial to be removed. She prayed for strength, that enabling power of the Atonement, and was able to “do physically what she could not do in her own power.” I need to learn from this! During my tough pregnancies, I was constantly counseled by the Lord to study the scriptures. Is this what I was supposed to learn from the scriptures? To pray for strength to persevere rather than pray for the HG to end?


  1. You need to check out this blog: http://whiningpuker.blogspot.com/ for HG information. She, and others, have found ways to overcome HG. She's also a delightful homeschooler and woman of great faith.